Alone time is important for one's sanity and for relaxing and regaining composure, but how much isolation is too much? The feeling of loneliness can be overwhelming and can lead people to make irrational decisions in order to stop feeling the desolation that life can bring. As humans, we desire some sort of interaction with others, even the most introverted people will eventually want more interaction if the isolation is forced. The song “Stan” by Eminem is a good example of what happens when someone perceives their situation as being one of complete solitary confinement. Stan’s feeling of being marginalized and not heard by his idol lead him to do horrible things to himself and his loved ones.
Humans are hardwired to interact with others, especially during times of stress (McAndrew). We don't know what kind of situation Stan was in, economically or otherwise, but the song hints that he is very unstable and irrational with his decisions. He wrote to Eminem saying things about self-harm, and how he cuts himself “ to see how much it bleeds” (Eminem). Because of this isolation, Stan wants some sort of contact with the person he idolizes most. Eminem's life has been hard, so Stan seems to be able to relate to him, as his letters to Eminem suggest. One would think that Stan is writing these letters so that for once, he might be heard, and not feel so alone. Being that no response was received, Stan fell apart. Isolation and/or rejection by others psychologically wounds us more deeply than really anything else as it increases stress and cognitive decline (McAndrew). It should be mentioned that these feelings were only anecdotal, and no real evidence of true isolation or social rejection was cited. These perceived notions of loneliness were the last straw for an already unstable Stan, and lead him to drive “his car over a bridge, and had his girlfriend in the trunk, and she was pregnant with his kid” (Eminem).
As Stan was in emotional turmoil, bad decisions were made. First off, the isolation that Stan was experiencing was the very factor that made him hurt himself, as the perceived feeling of worthlessness was eating at him. But, the real problems were brought to Eminem's attention not by a letter from Stan, but by a broadcast on the news. In this broadcast, the news anchor dictated that some inebriated man drove off of a bridge died. He went on to mention that not only had Stan killed himself but his pregnant wife as well. In the wreckage, they found a tape, but the recipient was not mentioned on the news.
In the song, Eminem expressed real concern for his fan -he never responded to Stan as when confronted in person, he was moved away from the throng of people and did not receive the letters until it was too late- and told him to be more careful and to take better care of himself. Unfortunately, Eminem found out that the person he saw on the news was the person who had been obsessing over him all of this time. The effects of social isolation and inadequacy were too much and Stan decided to take matters into his own hands and end it all.
Stan was unfortunate and did not seek the attention of the people who were around him every day. The feeling of ostracism overwhelmed him, which caused him to ease the pain with a drink. In his intoxicated state, his anger and sadness most likely escalated, and the liquid courage did nothing to make things better. Ending his life was the consequence of isolation, and it just so happened that Eminem’s late response was the last straw for this poor soul. Essentially, no one wants to be alone, especially as the effects of the extreme devastating.
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